My Easter Weekend Update

Willows of the Night

Health Update

Everything is continuing to track well on the health front.  I haven’t had any major GVHD flare-ups in a long time now and we are continuing on our weekly taper.  This Friday I reached the 50mg milestone for my prednisone dose (if you remember I used to be at 200mg) and next week I scheduled to hit 40mg.  This constant tapering has really helped to keep my spirits high. J

This week was quite a busy week for as I had two hospital visits. The first was just the basic bi-weekly checkup which went smoothly.   On Thursday I was back for two appointments. 

Puff and Blow

This is what Al always calls the tests I had first thing.  It is a pulmonary function test but essentially the tests are testing your Big Bad Wolf ability to huff and puff and blow a house down.  They did this test before my transplant to get my baseline and going forward it allows them to see if the radiation or GVHD is degrading my lung capacity.  I huffed and puffed but didn’t blow any houses down J  I haven’t noticed too much difference in my lungs so I am quite curious to see the results the next time I go in for a checkup.

Touching my Heart

The second appointment on Thursday was something I have been looking forward to it for quite some time now.  Since I came out of the hospital I knew that I wouldn’t have the true feeling of moving to the recovery stage until my Hickman Line was taken out.  Thursday this wonderful day finally came and the tube was pulled from my heart.  I kept the line as a souvenir, although I am not sure what I am going to do with it just yet. 

I have to come up with some creative way to display the many mementos I have collected from this journey.  I am just not quite sure how yet.

Project 365

If you haven’t noticed already, I have changed the template of the blog slightly.  I have added a new page at the top labeled “365 Days of Photos”.  If you click this page it will take you to a site that I have created to document each day’s photo.  I have written a little blurb for each photo so I hope you enjoy.  I would love to hear feedback and comments. 

April Weather

The weather this April has made it a real challenge for me and my photography.   Almost every day it is raining but it is guaranteed to be overcast.  And even good overcast with contrasts in the clouds, just flat boring grey.  I have managed to keep up the photo journey but I have had to be quite creative in finding ways to shoot.  The past two nights I have tried my hand at night photography.  That has been quite a challenging but rewarding experience.  The lighting changes so much faster at night, you are always changing your camera.  It has been a good way for me to get used to my camera though. I have included my three favorite shots so far.  There is much room for improvement but as always I would love to hear your thoughts.

The rest of my Free Time

When I am not shooting with my camera I am usually reading about photography.  This past week I began another little side project and started bringing everything I have learnt so far to try and create a beginners photography course.  It is still in the infancy so stay tuned. J

Well that is all from me.  I hope everyone has a great Easter Weekend.

Canadian Real Estate

Lonely Walk

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Shooting From the Hip - Lessons from a Gunsligner

“Are you talking to me punk?”

If there is any quote that brings a quicker mental image to your mind I would love to hear about it.  This quote instantly transports me into the good ol’ country western days.  Standing on a dusty windy street, with a ball of tumbleweed blowing across it, while I am staring down a younger, menacing version of Clint Eastwood, with his hands ready at his side, pistol cocked ready to fire.  Do you ever notice they never miss; every shot is dead on target.

One technique employed in photography that I have been experimenting with lately has a western style shooting influence to it.  Similar to the cowboys of old, you shoot the picture directly from the side of your hip.  As you are walking around and you see something interesting you just raise the barrel of the camera slightly and press the shutter; just like the cowboys no precise aiming, just point and fire right from the hip. 

Unlike the western movies, shooting the camera from the hit is not a one shot one “kill” enterprise.  It is more like 1 in every 10 shots and that might be framed properly.  A keeper is more like 1 in 50 or 1 in 100.  In order to improve this rate, I often practice this technique when I am walking around just shooting random things trying to work on my timing and framing.  One of the hardest things about this technique is actually getting your subject properly in the frame of your photo.   

Photography isn’t the only place where the cowboy mentality of shooting from the hip takes place.  We often shoot from our hip in our everyday lives.  Think of all the times we react rashly, or lay accusations before we have all the proper information.  Isn’t it this very similar to my street photography?  Once in awhile we will get lucky, everything will align and this cowboy mentality will work out for us.  But just as in photography, this is not a highly accurate technique and we will have many more misses. 

In my photography I can just delete all the images that were misses, no harm no foul. Whereas in life, when we shoot from the hip we are much closer to that dusty western street with Clint, except our misses are often the thing that hurts the other person the most.

Keeping with the gunfighter theme, the best technique I have found in both photography and life is to take a sniper approach.  This is a much more methodical way of collecting all the relevant information available to them at time.  Taking the time to analyze this information and then make their decisions based on this before developing their plan to move forward. 

This is the technique that always renders the best images.  Just like the sniper you scout your location, access the variables like lighting.  You then make the adjustments to your gear to get the best possible shot and then wait patiently for the right subject to appear and the fire the shutter.

How do you mainly go about your day to day life? Do you usually fire from the hip and do damage control after the fact or take the much more calculated approach? 
Can you think of any other situations in our day to day lives where there is the cowboy versus sniper mentalities at play? 
Is shooting from the hip ever more effective than the calculated approach? 

I would love to hear your thoughts.

 

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The Bad Stuff Sticks?

Today is a very special day for me.  I am honoured to have a blogger that I have followed and looked up to for sometime now honour with writing a post for me.  Today Corinne Rodrigues from Everyday Gyaan has agreed to write a post for my blog. 

Corinne is one of the very first bloggers that I connected with when I first started trying to grow my blog.  From the first time I read her blog I was hooked.  I love her positive outlook on life and her wonderful ability for reflection.  In addition, while designing the look of my blog Corinne was instrumental in more ways that even she knows.  She offered her advice many times on different designs I was working with but I also used her blog as a template when designing mine.  I am very excited for todays post and I hope you all have time to check out her website as well, I think you will enjoy it just as much as me.

Everyday Gyaan

Without any further adieu.......

THE BAD STUFF STICKS? 

Aaron and I 'met' recently and from the very first connection I was amazed by how positive he was. "Here's  someone I could learn a lot from", I thought. And I was right. Aaron continues to surprise me with his outlook and now more recently with his captivating photographs. It's an honor to write a post for your blog, Aaron. Thanks for asking.

from google images


  Every time I happen upon "Pretty Woman" on television I can't help watching the movie to the end. There's just something about the movie that captivates me. I feel the same way about 'My Fair Lady' - which is more or less along the same lines. I think the story of the underdog getting a break and making the most of it and winning the 'hero' over by just being herself, that gets me.

Anyway, it was only last week that I watched 'Pretty Woman' again (!!) and that's the first time these lines struck me:

Vivian: People put you down enough, you start to believe it.

Edward: I think you… are a very bright, very special woman.

Vivian: The bad stuff is easier to believe. You ever notice that? 

The bad stuff is easier to believe.......and I thought to myself 'Is it really?'  

A few years ago, I would have said an unequivocal 'Yes, it is!". 

But now I say the bad stuff is easier to believe when you suffer from low self-esteem.  When you don't think highly of yourself you don't believe anyone else can. So for example, if someone says to you "Oh  you look so pretty/handsome", you give the credit to your hairstylist or the place where you bought your clothes from. You find it difficult to say a sincere "Thank you."  In other words, compliments and positive feedback doesn't 'stick' with you. 

On the other hand, when someone says things that aren't very pleasant, they're easy to believe because it is a reinforcement of your beliefs about yourself. 

Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in one's own sunshine. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson 

Vivian had an Edward to 'rescue' her and help her to see herself as she really was.   Are you waiting for an Edward to come along? Or are you going to rescue yourself? Fall in love with yourself and soon you'll find that the bad stuff doesn't 'stick' anymore!

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Why Leukemia Was the Best Thing To Happen To Me

Have you ever heard the cliché, “Cancer was the best thing to happen to me”?  If you have been following my blog for a bit, you will have heard some variation of this over the past year.  You must think the person is crazy to be uttering such a statement.  Don’t worry its okay to admit J 

Before I got sick I thought the whole “Cancer was the best thing to happen to me” was just a crock of shit.  I mean how could it be?  You are told you might die; then you go through treatment more akin to torture than treatment, which in the end might not even work.  And if it does work, you can look forward to living with the fear of the cancer coming back at sometime.  I used to think “you tell me how that can be the best thing to happen to you, because I am sitting pretty over here.”

Well we all know what happened since, I got leukemia, went through the treatments that thankfully worked and am now recovering.  In addition, over the past year I was converted to one of the “crazies” who thinks Cancer is one of the best things that could happen to me. 

The funny thing is that, although I have felt this way for past year if you were to actually ask me why it was one of the best things to happen to me, I actually wouldn’t have been able to answer you.  Sure I would have told you that it had caused me to re-examine my life, weigh what is truly important to me, and helped me build character.  But that is just a cliché answer to a cliché question.

I say that because anyone can make those changes, you definitely don’t need cancer to be able to do it.  Therefore, there has to be something more.  It must change people on a deeper level, a level not readily available to everyone.  I can’t speak for other cancer patients because everyone’s experience is completely different; let alone their disease, so I will only comment on my own circumstances.

It wasn’t until I was leaving the hospital from my check-up this past week when the light bulb finally went off and I understood the root of why Leukemia became one of the best things to happen to me.  After my appointment with the doctor, I visited with a gentleman named Keith, who is going through his transplant currently.  We were discussing everything to do with the transplant and I was giving him some tips to help with the side effects.  We ended up chatting for about 45 minutes, but there was one specific topic that stuck with me as I left. 

We were discussing the transplant, and got onto the topic of just how brutal the treatment truly is.  We were discussing how they literally bring to the brink of being dead and then bring you back again.  I always knew how brutal the Leukemia treatment protocol was but to actually verbalize it and realize they are basically killing the patient by bringing them right to the brink and then bringing them back from the dead brought a sobering and humbling feeling to whole experience. 

We often talk about how things in this world always happen for a reason.  Well this was one of those days for me.  After visiting with Keith, I went to get my prescriptions from the pharmacy before leaving the hospital.  As I was leaving the pharmacy I was still reflecting on our discussion when I just happened to look up at the quote board.  Each day PMH has a new inspirational quote wrote on a white board in their hallway.  Most days I walk by without looking but this day I decided to look up as I walked by.  The quote for the day came from Dorothy Thompsom and it read:

"Only when we are no longer afraid do we begin to live"

It was almost a chilling experience when I read it.  At that instant the light-bulb went off and I finally understood the root of why Leukemia was one of the best things to happen to me.  Leukemia and the treatment had forced me to stare death in the face; in fact, twice! I was no longer afraid of it.  This lack of fear has enabled me to focus more on other things in my life, begin to truly appreciate the gifts it offers, and enjoy all the aspects of living.

I would love to hear your thoughts on my reflection and I hope it maybe helped shed some light onto that common Cancer Cliché. 

As always the photo still needs a title so don’t forget your suggestions!

 

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A Greyish Morning - Self Evaluation

Today was originally going to be the beginning of my series titled "A Black and White Affair" in which I would share my favorite black and white shots.  The reason for the title difference is I have included two images which aren't quite black and white. 

This past weekend was just brutal weather here along the lake.  It was cold, raining, and extremely windy.  This really reduced my ability to take pictures.  It did however allow me to take a step back and look at the big picture when it came to my photography.  This included where do I want to take it, what do I enjoy about it, what is my style, and most importantly I went through everyone of one of my images evaluating them.

I had read an article on Thomas Hogan's website before about how difficult it is for people to evaluate their own work.  The reason we have such a difficult time is we have an emotional connection to the work.  We sees stories and subjects that might not be conveyed that strongly in the piece because of our personal connection.  A photograph should take no explanation for the viewer to understand it.  This is why I like vague titles for my shots and don't often include the stories behind it.  I like you, the viewer, to find your own story in the piece.

If it isn't your strongest work, you aren't supposed to share it, well at least that is the rule of thumb.  So going forward I am going to limit my photo posts to only 3-4 images.  I will only go over when there truly if it is truly special.  Because the weather was so bad this past weekend  I was refrained from shooting, so instead I went through evaluating all my images.  Don't worry I still got my one shot a day in, so my 365 is still going :) 

I learnt some really interesting thing going through my images that I had never noticed before.  First off, there were a bunch of shots that were almost there.  By this I mean the scene and composition were good but I was just missing one piece to make it a great shot.  I now have a list of shooting locations that I can go back to and just wait for that missing piece :) 

I also learnt something really interesting about the way I look at the world.  In photography one of the main compositional techniques is to move a viewer from the bottom left hand corner into the frame as this is the way most of us naturally want to see.  As I look through my pictures I have realized that I am the opposite.  In most of my photos I compose coming from the right hand side into the frame.  I even was looking at shots from years ago when I knew nothing about photography, but same thing, I moved the viewer from the right to left.  Is this wrong or right, you tell me.  I don't I will change because it is my natural style but I found it was an interesting observation. 

To self evaluate is a very difficult exercise.  We need to set all emotional connections aside, take a step back, and ask difficult questions.  Although, it is hard it is essential for us to improve in whatever craft we are evaluating.  And you never know, by doing so you might find out some interesting details that you never knew about yourself :)  Without further adieu, my Monday morning photos....

Pondering

Recession

Barren

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