October 11, 2011
Over the past month and a half life has been extremely hectic around here between moving, getting sick, battling two infections in my mouth and battling what looks to be a case of GI tract GVHD. I have really not felt well for almost 4 weeks which is an extreme drain on your mood, yes even on me Mr Positive :)
It had sucked all enjoyment out of my life. I had to drastically change my diet to a very bland diet consisting of no fibre, fatty foods, or dairy. I had low energy, and couldn't eat very much due to both pain in my mouth and loss of appetite. To top it all off with the GI problems were causing me to always have to go to the washroom, which meant I couldn't stray far from home.
This is one of the reasons I started the photography year in review as a means to try and find some joy again. It is not healthy for us to continually be down, it breeds depression and can be harder and harder to pull ourselves out of with each passing day.
My doctors have been working diligently and I am slowly on the mend. My mouth seems to have been sorted out with a cocktail of drugs over the past couple weeks, and now we have ruled out all other causes for the gut problems except for GVHD. I will be going for a test (one I must say I thought I had many years before I would have to experience) to confirm the GVHD. Until then though, my steroids were increased to stop the inflammation and I was given two antibiotics to cover any infections that can't be detected until the test is complete. Needless to say my new cocktail, although a bandaid, has begun to restore some normalcy back into my life.
This past weekend I did a thanksgiving related post asking what we are each most thankful for and for me I said being alive. To some this may seem like an obvious answer for me as I have been battling cancer, but I wanted to ask each of you why it wasn't your biggest thanks too. If you think about it, the greatest gift we have is to wake up each morning and experience a new a beautiful day.
During my downtime I lost sight of this wonderful gift and began to lose my appreciation for this gift as my mind was elsewhere. It is funny how easily we can become distracted by the smaller things in life and lose track of what is most important so easily. I am sure it happens to each of you at times, just as it happened to me. When was the last time you sat back and said to yourself when that pesky alarm went off, "Man what a great feeling it is to be alive"? I bet not too often..
There are little ways to help with this though. Each morning before you really get into your daily routine and grind, take a moment to look around and reflect at the beauty around you. On your way to your car take a deep lung filling breath of the fresh cool fall air. If the leaves are changing colours, take in the beauty of the season. In essence, just take in life around you. This helps you slow things down, even for a brief moment to allow you bask in all the glory that you were healthy enough to be out of bed, hopefully healthy, and enjoying the wonderments of our world.
So next time that pesky alarm goes off, don't dread the coming day as you slam down the snooze button. Get excited, there is a beautiful world our there for you to soak up and just be happy being part of its existence!